I’ve seen my child who has a disability thrive at times. I’ve also seen him not doing very well or as I might say, “fall a part.” At still other times, he’s done well on the surface but not made any forward progress. How does a child thrive and not fall into the other scenarios? The right level of supports is the main reason. Well, let’s explore that this means.
I’ve found that if my son has supports that allow him to be successful, this is when he thrives. They can’t be too easy. The supports need to create a little bit of challenge but still feel attainable. It’s a lot like a baby that is learning to walk. A parent has to create an opportunity for the child to let go of the furniture to take a step by himself to reach the other parent. After he is successful than the parent creates a little further distance for the baby to walk. Any parent has done this and before long that child is walking all over the place.
Let me share an example of this. My son has dysgraphia (handwriting disability). An accommodation given to him was that his high school history teacher would let him answer the daily questions orally. His teacher came into my son’s study hall once a quarter and listened to my son’s answers to all the daily questions. It took a little extra time but my son could demonstrate he understood everything for a nine week period as long as he could do it orally and in a quiet setting. It was just enough accommodation to show mastery but not so much where my son didn’t grow. This accommodation was done in most of his classes. The great thing that came from this is that he didn’t just do it with a para professional but with a number of teachers which helped him develop greater relational skills with a variety of adults.
This will take lots of trial and error. The needs with change. Sometimes you will push too hard and sometimes the demands won’t be enough to help your child move forward. It’s not easy figuring out the right level of support but it’’s so important to keep working toward it.
Let me know some strategies that work for you!
